Your should never be a Groom if.....

You should never be a Groom if any (or all) of the following apply!  PS - Sarcasm alert! 

 

1.  You should never be a Groom if …You think cleaning stalls and sheaths and crusty feed pans is beneath you.  Because being a Groom is the process of cleaning horses and EVERYTHING that surrounds them.  No exceptions.   The barn sparkles, the horses gleam, the feed room is spotless.  All of the dirt and dust and hair and grossness ends up on YOU.  There’s no room for ego here, but there is room to invest in stock of your favorite personal shampoo and body wash. 

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If the thought of wearing all of this hair and dirt doesn't appeal to you, don't be a Groom. 

 

2. You should never be a Groom if …You already know all there is to know about horses.  Yeah, right.  Not even HORSES know all there is to know about horses, and they have a head start!  Grooming means learning.  Good Grooms will learn as things come up, great Grooms will seek out knowledge.  The amazing horse professionals like Vets and Farriers are all their own encyclopedias!

 

3.  You should never be a Groom if …The possibility of working harder than anyone has ever worked for a small chance to travel the world in order to continue working harder is not tempting AT ALL.  This is the major perk of being a Groom - working at international shows.  But it’s still work - and work that takes you away from home.  This may, or may not, be a good thing!

 

4. You should never be a Groom if …You want to bask in all of the spotlight.  Hee, hee…. the spotlight is not for most Grooms.  Mainly because our job is literally and figuratively in the background.  Which, by the way, creates the most interesting backgrounds in photos.  I believe the truly talented Grooms are also the best photo bombers.  

 

5. You should never be a Groom if …Getting up at the crack of dawn is absolutely not possible, ever.  The absurdity of Groom’s hours is no laughing matter - most barns start at 6am or 7am, unless there is travel which often times happens much earlier.  Don’t forget about night check the day before, sick horses, wacky rider schedules and weird weather to work around. 

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It's beyond frigid outside and your pony stole your hat, yet you need to still work.  Sound bad?  Then grooming isn't for you. 

 

6. You should never be a Groom if …The “weather” that you enjoy most consists of indoor, climate controlled conditions.  As a Groom you and Mother Nature become one.  A/C is for wimps in the summer and frigid winter temps are remedied by working harder and being creative with your clothes.  The perk of this is that you become an expert clothing layer maker, which likely doesn’t have any marketable value but it’s a good skill to have. 

 

7. You should never be a Groom if …You prefer not to be strong.  Grooming is not just physically challenging (stacking hay and hand walking a zillion steps a day), it’s emotionally challenging, too.  Long hours and often thankless work add up, and there’s always the heartache of a horse that’s sold or passes on.  

 

8. You should never be a Groom if …Weekly mani and pedi sessions at the salon are top notch priority.  Wait…you can still have weekly nail appointments if you are a Groom.  Saddle conditioner works great to soften hands, and a hoof pick can also get the grime out of your nails.  Tah-dah!  And see how much money you saved?

 

9. You should never be a Groom if …Dirt gives you a heart attack.  See number 1.  The bonus to this is the most satisfying shower you will ever take.  You really feel as if your soap is getting a workout.  

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If the sight of this amazing creature doesn't make your heart sing, grooming is not for you.  And yes, he's wet and dirty.  #groomsdream

 

The next list could contain reasons whey you SHOULD be a Groom - but for goodness sake, that list is a mile long!